Guys & Skinny Jeans!

I proudly possess a black pencil jean, I call her Sally. Yes, my pencil jean is a ‘her’ and yes! I named her! I have this habit of naming my favourite things. Anyways, I’ve been wearing her for a long time now and I am oh so reluctant to bury her just yet… the way she carves out my thighs and that little thing I call a behind, I just love! We all know how the guys love a girl with nice straight legs, with the curves right where they oughta be at! I’m not saying that’s why I love my dear Sally… okay, I lied! That’s why I love Sally, plus me and her go way back.
To the point… so I come back from school one afternoon and my brother walks into the living room wearing nothing butfl a blue jean. There’s nothing wrong with that picture, right? But there was, at least back then there was! His jean was cut skinny! The words were outta my mouth before I could control myself “dude, is someone bending you over now?!” You can imagine all the nasty names he called me, one of them being ‘old school’. He said I was ‘old school’ cos I didn’t know skinny jeans was what was in vogue now for the guys! Skinny jeans! How?! What was more shocking was that he no longer owned one regular-cut jean… all the jeans in his wardrobe had somehow transformed to skinny jeans.

That same week, I was flipping through a Nigerian fashion magazine, and there was this dude in this really cool shirt and skinny-cut trouser! I checked the description below the picture and they called this particular piece of clothing “a carrot pant”. What? So it doesn’t end on jeans, they’ve extended it to trousers too? Carrot pant, indeed!

Now you ask me what my take is on skinny jeans/carrot pants? I’ll tell you… even though I regularly call my brother ‘gay’, I must be sincere and say those skinny jeans look good on the dude; and that guy in the magazine, that orange carrot pant looked extremely lovely on him! However, there is always that other side of the coin, innit?

I was at a party some weeks back and this dude was in skinny jean (that no longer surprises me!). The thing was cut too tight and too slim, for a boy! In my mind, I was like “okay, maybe this guy has nice legs, but now I don’t even wanna see anymore!” I’m a sucker for nice, hot, strong, masculine legs… but thing is, even if that guy possessed such, the jean had already pissed me off! Dude, obviously drew bad attention that day! Somehow, I remembered my ex. Let’s call him Bob. For all I lacked in ‘backside’, Bob made up for it! That man’s got very lush behind that I love to grab all the time! Now, imagine Bob in skinny jeans! I don’t even wanna picture it, I love my mind’s eye too much, don’t want it to go blind! Whoever said ‘cut your coat according to your size’ was definitely not talking about that lush behind and skinny jeans. LWKMD!

My conclusion? I think we should all just put on what fits us and makes us free (to move and from gossip!). One tiny problem I might have though is that, what would a guy in skinny jean do if he gets a hard-on, with hardly a pocket to put his hand in! #dilemma