KILANBAKA!

Waaaay back before I got into the Uni, I used to work with this couple; and a certain very handsome, very tall, very fair in complexion dude used to come around a lot... I think at some point, we became friends. His name was Kayode! Yes, was! Long story, but I'll shorten it!

I got into Uni the following year and to my surprise Kayode was a student there... Somehow, we never talked to the point where he'd tell me he was a student of OOU! Anyways, familiar face in an environment that still seemed very unfamiliar to me was very welcome; although that friendship did not exactly become stronger... the gap between us did not allow it -  I was a fresher and well... he was not a fresher, he was actually one of the big boys in school, drove a car, had a lot of money to throw around, et cetera!

Later, I started to hear a lot of rumours about how Kayode's ways weren't "pure"... well, that's how we used to say it then... "him way no pure at all!". Some thought he was into internet fraud, others thought he was a gigolo, some even thought he was into voodoo! You see, there were a lot of boys back then that we'd heard plenty stories about how they had sacrificed one thing or the other just so they could be one of the rich and famous in school! Boys (and girls) that wanted to put the cart before the horse!

Anyways, Kayode and I, at that time, never saw anymore; so there was no way I could find out what was going on with him.

Then one day, I was in my room, and my friend Yano comes in and says, "Hey babes, remember that your Kayode friend? He died overnight... They'd gone to a club in Ijebu-Ode, they were all drunk, Kayode drove, they were involved in an accident and Kayode was the only one that COULD not survive! They said if he hadn't been a heavy smoker and drinker, maybe his organs wouldn't have put up so little fight..."

All I could say was "But kini Kayode n ba ka!". Unfortunately, whatever it is he was ba ka-ing, it was too late! Too late to say goodbye, too late to ask if the rumours were true, too late for anything! All that handsomeness gone too soon cos he didn't understand that for every thing there is a season!

Years later, my friend T-Beiz does this song (KILANBAKA), and I think of all the people that wanna run ahead of time and be "big" NOW! All the folks that only think about shining NOW! I think of the people that have thrown patience and long-suffering away, and have chosen haste, the present, the temporary glitter over a permanent one! I think of Kayode - tall, handsome, fair Kayode with the great smile and beautiful teeth... coulda been somebody's husband, father, somebody's shoulder to lean on!

Ki la n ba ka! It's a Yoruba saying that means "What exactly are you all over the place about?" Sometimes, people are looking for stuff that is not lost! Sometimes people forget that waiting is the answer. Waiting for your time, and preparing yourself for when that thing arrives. Many want things that they cannot currently handle, and then they meet all sorts of unfortunate things at the end!

As I listened to this song again, my heart bled for Kayode and tears filled my eyes...

My Labour Law lecturer used to recite one Yoruba adage to us back then, he'd say "A kii saaju eleede peede!" It sorta means that one shouldn't presume to know better than the owner/creator (of something). God knows what's best for you, and when it's best for you; and He cannot give you more than you can handle! Please let us not try to become what we are not ready to become, and when we are not ready to become it! B'ori ba pe ni'le, a di're, all na time!

Seems like I've started rambling! This is the Kilanbaka song; performed by my friend T-Beiz, produced by the wonderful gentleman that was also the producer of my gospel medley and DWW song - Ski. Also available for download on notjustok. Enjoy!

RISE UP!

Hey guys,

So, this is not a write-up... I'm staying up late tonight (got some serious work to do!), and I jus' heard this song... Written by my girl, Sia... Performed by Queen B aka Mama Blue Ivy... I'm loving it, and it's on repeat! Thought I'd share...

For all my insomniac friends, and all those who are staying up to get some work done too, let me be the matriarch of your night! Here's Rise Up:

Hosted by Kiwi6 file hosting.

Download mp3 - Free Music Hosting.


(It's actually the soundtrack for Epic, for those who've seen the movie)

Now That You Want To Marry…

I wrote this for a friend's magazine (Cosmic Ray) a while back... Thought I'd blog it on this lovely Saturday >>>

Two of my colleagues just gave me the news (well, not at the same time) – they’re getting married. Oh wow! Rice and stew very plenty, and Ankara too!

As much as I was excited for them, my radar was all over the place. Why were these ladies getting married now? I mean, yeah they’re already at very marriageable ages BUT something just didn’t feel too right; so I sent my human German shepherds to go sniffing, and yes, they did find something…

There was nothing mysterious about Lady A’s sudden wedding announcement; Lady B, however, was pregnant! Hence, rush wedding hour! Not like I’m saying there’s anything mysterious about pregnancies; as a matter of fact, finding out that you’re expecting a child WHEN you indeed want one is a wonderful thing.

Lady B is expecting, but does she want it?

‘It’ doesn’t just mean the child; ‘it’ means everything! The child, the rush wedding, the about-to-change marital status, the new responsibilities as a mother and wife, the man! Yes, the man! Not every girl out there is married to their Mr. Right, because they ‘mistakenly’ got pregnant for Mr. Not-So-Right!

Pregnancy, pressure, haste – what is pushing you to fix a date? Are you like Lady A who is shopping for a wedding dress because that time has come and she WANTS to be married or are you like Lady B who isn’t well enough to go shopping yet because of the evils of the first trimester?!

“I do…” You’ve been dreaming of those words; words that once uttered seals the deal. Life will be such bliss after those words; the pressure, the disrespect back at home, everything ends! BUT do you know that new things begin after those words? Are you ready?!

Apply some brakes to your very sugary thoughts about how your life will be much better after “I do”; answer this question for me – what exactly are you do-ing?! Agreed, you DO take him/her as your lawfully wedded husband/wife, to love, respect and honour him/her throughout your years together… yada yada yada! Yeah, I get it up to that point, but…

DO you take him/her when his/her hygiene is intolerable?

DO you take him/her when he/she has a zero relationship level with God?

DO you take him/her when his/her health is really (REALLY) poor?

DO you take him/her when he’s/she’s comparing you with girlfriends/boyfriends past?

DO you take him/her when his/her angry looks are throwing daggers right at you bull’s-eye style?

DO you take him/her when y’all run into his/her ex and you discover there’s some unburied ish still going on?

DO you still take him when, after a quarrel, he refuses to talk to you for days?

What about when y’all are experiencing a little bit of financial setback, and she calls you ‘useless’ and ‘good-for-nothing’; DO you still wanna DO ?

What if you had a miscarriage and he says “look, the only reason we were (translate to 'I was') getting into this was ‘cause of the pregnancy, let’s call off the wedding”, DO you still..?

If you still DO after you’ve thought about all these stuff and more, and you think you can take it all, then congrats! You can, indeed, say you WANT to marry; go on, I give you the go-ahead to go down on your best knee and ask her to be yours forever!

Just remember, once you say I DO, you have given yourself – body and soul – to the one you love. The die is cast. It will be too late to question whether his snoring drives you crazy with irritation or whether she’s the most annoying person during her cycle! Better to be sure before you decide you WANT to marry.

My work here is done! Hope you enjoyed reading it! Y'all have a wonderful weekend... 

CORRINE II

Olamilekan.

People are quick to see the negative sides of things, I know that from experience! I don’t know if it is pessimism, or fate jus’ has a way of bringing you the worst because you have always had the mentality of “preparing for the worst”.

Adesewa.

There are many awkward moments in life… One of them is when you walk up to a girl in a club and yell (cos of the loud music) “hey, I know you! You go to Bowen, don’t you?” “Ummm… no!” *cue in my Corrine blonde moment look* Of course, I knew she did not go to Bowen, but hey, I was bored outta my mind and I decided to errr… what is that Dre calls it sef… aha! “dare the impossible!” Hehehe… Not that what I did was impossible! It just took a lot of (alcohol in the) guts!

“Oh, sorry. I’m Corrine. Is it me, or is clubbing overrated?!” Miss Gorgeous laughed out loud, “First time?” “Yep, and I wish I had just stayed back at home!” “Oh poor darling…” She laughs some more. “Oya come let’s dance”.

Two girls jiggling to D’banj’s Suddenly, with not a care in the world! That’s the story of Sewa and I – a friendship that has lasted for years, and only grew stronger even after I confessed to her about my Bowen pick-up line!

The Date I Crashed.

Noir. Schwarz. Nero. Svart. Black. Colour I love! Is it weird that I love black? Like I said before, people always are quick to see only the negative sides of things. “Kilode? Are you mourning? Who died?” I hear that on the regular, cos I wear black clothing a lot! Folks fail to see that black oozes mystery, power and elegance! In the world of fashion and design, a black suit can make you thinner, and a black background will make all the other colours stand out!

So after I decided to crash Sewa’s date, the next dilemma was what to wear; I was gonna wear a Bart Simpson tee and crazy jeans for my now-cancelled date. Now I was in the mood to cause some serious havoc, and I knew the only thing that could do it was that black gown Mr. Eric sent to my agent’s office for me the other day. We had gone to model some of his clothes, and someone must have whispered in his ears that black was my favourite colour during or after the shoot. I took the dress out of my wardrobe with a mischievous smile on my face; I can imagine the look on Sewa’s face when I locate what table she’s at with her date. Will the dude be cute? Sewa was never really a sucker for good looks, as long as the dude was eloquent and he’s got great arms; I once asked her what the story was with the arms, she said “Good strong arms just makes me fantasize about falling, and Seigneur Strong Arms catches me just before I hit the floor; and he bends to plant a deep kiss on my lips!” I hit her face with the pillow before she caught her breath enough to continue with her fantasy, “You have got to stop watching cartoons and Indian movies, I swear!” But really, I thought about it, I wouldn’t mind being in that kinda situation even if it’s just once… every girl should be entitled to a true-love’s-kiss moment once in their lifetime!

I was torn between wearing a bra or not under the dress. How much chaos am I willing to cause exactly? I decided little chaos would do, before dude forgets who he really should be paying attention to by the time I get to their table. I let Sia’s Breathe Me play as I began to dress, humming along with the She Wolf crooner… “unfold me, I am small and needy…”

I was overdressed! Who cares! Fortunately, ‘cos it was the World Cup period, the restaurant 

had only a few people in it; I didn’t have to look around for so long before I spotted Sewa, she was wearing the blue version of my black sequined sleeveless top. We had bought it when the boutique near the house was doing their price slash week; and she was wearing the leather leggings. Even as a girl, I was mentally drooling as I approached their table.

“Hey S!” I started to grin like I was a lil tipsy on gin, but then I stopped as I saw the larger grin on Sewa’s face – not quite the expression I was hoping for. “You never disappoint, C! We’ve been expecting you!” We? I had not paid any attention to her date, but ‘cos of that one word – we – I was interested; I turned my head and let’s jus’ say I struggled to breathe for the next few seconds. “Easy girl, it’s just me, not the grim reaper!” That voice. Even if his ‘fro was gone, and it took me a lil bit to recognise him… that voice!

I turned back to Sewa, “S, you didn’t!” “Actually, she didn’t. It was all me, knowing how much you love dramatic gestures. Now, please would you take a seat and join us, three is not necessarily a crowd.” He got up to help me in the chair that obviously was reserved for me; I stopped him and glowered, looking straight into his eyes. If looks could burn, an extinguisher couldn’t save him! I felt Sewa touch my arm, “Corrine, please, calm down first na. There are answers to your unasked questions…” “I don’t have any questions.” I brushed her hand off my arm, turned and started to walk out of the restaurant, forgetting to wonder if anyone – male or female – turned their heads to stare as I walked out the door, as is the norm.

Olamilekan.

The first and only time I fell in love, I prepared for the worst; maybe because I’ve heard so 

many people say it’s the best thing to do, but that’s what I did – prepare for the worst; and the worst did happen!

Dude I never wanna run into ever again, I literally walked into him myself!

No really, Sewa didn’t!

*****

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Written by Faith John @rebelkween

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