BOY RAPE!

At 19, I was working... yeah! I was a salary-earner. Though the pay was so meagre, it was fun! I met a whole lot of people, some of whom I'm still great friends with. Anyways, that's not the point... the point is since I decided to write this blog, I've had a particular image running in my head... maybe I can finally get rid of it after this blog is done... Before I paint the image for ya lemme mention some relevant things - I close from work everyday at 9pm; Tope was my female work buddy; I usually walk home every night, yeah I love the night breeze blowing in my face so I walked even though my legs would disagree sometimes....

THE IMAGE

Tope and I were strolling home, recounting the day's events and probably mimicking our boss... then, Tope says she needs to pee real bad, and asks me to walk her into a nearby bush so she can do her thing. I follow her and even try to find a suitable spot for her when she pushes me to the ground, stick in hand and threatens that if I scream she's gonna kill me. Forced to obey her (like say I get choice!), I let her take off my skirt and panty and she shoves a real big ass dildo into my a**!

BACK TO REALITY

*cleaning the sweat off my brow* Yeah, that image had been playing in my head since I heard of the Denis-God's love rape. Y'all heard about that one? Well, I did. Before we go on to the story, I'd like to say the picture I painted above (all those words in italics?) didn't happen, I was just tryna relate (Tope, please don't come after me with a lawyer!)

Ok, so Denis is 19 and also God's love colleague at their workplace. I would want to assume they might be more than colleagues, they might be buddies - for them to walk home at the close of work... two males, walking home from work; some guys will say #nohomo right? Well, I'm sure God's love would say #nohomo if people insinuated a romantic affair between 'em two, but I'm not so sure about Denis (kid's got a nice name but not a nice character!). Anyways, Denis tells God's love he needs to look for something in the bush, pleads with him to come along, they get into the bush, Denis pushes God's love to the ground, asks him not to shout or he'd end his life, lowers both their pants and shoves his ugh into God's-love's very virgin a**. *double ouch!*

Our parents try so much to separate us from the opposite sex, fearing unwanted pregnancies and other sexual-related issues coming up so early in our lives; BUT I was wondering, how would my Dad feel if he knew that the girls he'd rather push me to make friends with were even more dangerous than the boys, how would he feel if it came to his knowledge that some girl, on our way back from work, could shove a dildo right up my part that would remain a virgin forever?! Most importantly, I wonder how God's-love's folks felt and thought after this incidence... would they ever let him be alone with any boy again. *smh* They'd be in a dilemma, not want him near a boy (cos they wouldn't know if the boy is another anal rapist); and not want him near a girl when he's not ready (that's after he's healed and is over the trauma enough to want to have sex with a girl)... or who knows, maybe this experience will turn him gay afterall...

No matter how this ends for God's-love, I really feel sorry for him cos yeah, maybe some of us girls like to be man-handled by our boyfriends when we want it rough and aggressive; but I seriously doubt that HE wanted to be man-handled by a fellow man, in the bush for that matter!

Conclusively, has it finally come to this in this part of the world? That boys have started raping boys?! :(

Fine Bara/Fine Toasting

Sometime in 2009

I was at a Skye Bank ATM in Ijebu-Igbo, as usual the queue was as long as... as... it was long sha. In all of Ijebu-Igbo, only that one cash-vomiting machine was functioning (that explains the queue, right?). Anyways, there was this guy standing in front of me... a lot of the shorties were staring at him (and probably drooling in their minds)... yeah, he was a looker but unfortunately I didn't fancy the light-complexioned ones much, especially when they are a little shorter than I am!

So the fair-complexioned guy, let's call him Oye (don't ask me why I chose that name!) got his turn just before I did, he fumbled for a while there, then got off and I got on the machine (hmmm... got on the machine... sounds erotic!). I took my cash from it, and got on my way home. As I was about to stop a bike, Oye walks up to me and says he wanted to talk about something really important... curiosity got the best of me, so I waved the bike away. He started by asking if I noticed that he was the one in front of me on the queue... yeah yeah, what next? Well, the thing is he didn't get cash off the machine, he found out his account had not been debited like he expected... yada yada yada! So what could I do for Oye? Dash him N500, so he can go back home and find something to eat! Ehn! N500! Long story short, I gave him o... Still, Oye would not leave me alone... ehen, what is it again? You want me to come and cook for you? Nah, he wanted to have my number and -wait for it...- follow me back to my hostel! How na?! Some boys can be really audacious! It was then I realized I had just been a victim of 'Fine Bara'... abi in this case, I think it, more appropriately, should be called 'Fine Toasting'... I got on a bike like I should have in the first place, and that was the last I saw of Oye, 'the fine bararian' (but rather awful toaster, tho).

FEW DAYS AGO

A lot was going through my head as I was walking down the Shokas road, my brain was holding pen and pad, writing stuff down... "My friend... my friend" I didn't wanna answer cos I knew if I was really the caller's friend, he'd know my name. I only turned back when I could almost feel his breath on my neck! Ehen, whatapun?! He was like 'you don't know me, but now you do, I'm the new friend you just made'... ah ahn! Seriously guys, you people should try to improve when it comes to pick-up lines.. go for training or something! I was laughing real hard, dude must have taken that as encouragement cos he started to narrate that old story I heard years ago... let's call this guy, Oye II. So, Oye II walked me all the way to my friend's crib telling me how he came all the way from Babcock to collect his stuff from a friend here, how he didn't meet the friend at home, how people told him the friend had been missing for 3 days, how he needed to go back to Babcock -yawns- ok na, go back... abi how I take enter the picture now?! Oh! but he was painting that picture for me! The help he wanted from me was to give him enough cash that'll take him to Ijebu-Ode cos he's certain that from there he can hitchhike to Babcock... E yaaa, I must have 'generous' written on my forehead! This dude was reeking of Perfume, holding a BB and a correct Nokia... still he's begging for money! Anyways, I couldn't let that lame trick work on me again, I told him I didn't have enough cash on me either, so I can't help out... Like Oye, Oye II too wouldn't let me be still. He kept following me... Then my voice got more sterner, dude I can't help out so why are you still tagging along... that was when he stopped, when I looked back Oye II had tears in his tiny goo-goo eyes! You see, 3 years ago that woulda got me... but nah, not anymore. Not after I learned guys too shed crocodile tears to have their way! With the fake tears in his eyes, he asked for my number... I shook my head and left him there standing! Cheesy bastard!

Murder at 15!

That right there is Alyssa Bustamante; as at when this picture was taken, she was 15, now she's 18. Yep! she's famous, and yeah she's sick; no, not sick like she's got malaria, sick like she's "an evil monster" like the mother of the little girl she gruesomely murdered called her!

You see, I dey always talk am, all these horror films wey we dey watch get consequences! How many of you has seen a movie where someone's throat was being cut and it just made you wonder what it'd feel like to end someone's life?! Be honest... I know a few people who've thought about it... AND that right there is where it all starts! This Alyssa girl wanted to know what it felt like to kill, so she strangled, repeatedly stabbed and slit the throat of another 9 year old girl!

"The teenager's defense attorneys had argued for a sentence less than life in prison, saying Bustamante's use of the antidepressant Prozac had made her more prone to violence. They said she had suffered from depression for years and once attempted suicide by overdosing on painkillers." - for full story, click here

So now they're blaming the medicine for inspiring her to kill... amazing! It is so obvious that this girl is a f**king psycho! What you don't believe me? Read this:

"I strangled them and slit their throat and stabbed them now they're dead," Bustamante wrote in her diary, which was read in court by a handwriting expert. "I don't know how to feel atm. It was ahmazing. As soon as you get over the 'ohmygawd I can't do this' feeling, it's pretty enjoyable. I'm kinda nervous and shaky though right now. Kay, I gotta go to church now...lol."

I hope a parent is reading this! All these our parents that force us to church mainly because they want us to pick a wife/husband from church! What do I know that the person sitting beside me during Sunday School did before coming in for the service - tortured a roach or killed a kid?! Lord, have mercy!

And did you notice something... she wrote, I strangled THEM... now THEY'RE dead! THEY! not HER... was that a grammatical error on her part or had she killed more than one?! *doing the cross sign*

Parents need to watch their kids, cos you never know what that mentally sick neighbour has got going through his/her head - what it'd feel like to maim, or what it'd feel like to rape! As for me, when that time comes I'm gonna be a very protective kangaroo-like mother, and keep my precious little joeys in my marsupium where I can see 'em!

Btw, this is the 9 year old she mercilessly murdered:

Adorable, isn't she?! But now 6-feet under... smh

A marriage is not a timeless agreement, it is one day; and each day, it begins anew

– Couples Retreat

a Friday on a February

Today, so far, has been one boring Friday - yep! It doesn't even feel like a Friday, it feels like a Saturday, a totally uneventful Saturday.

I doubt that I have wished y'all a happy new February? Well, it's just the 3rd day so I guess it's not too late... Happy new, 29-days February; it's a leap year, so take that leap of faith and move forward; outta that bad relationship, outta that bad mood, outta your subsidized, depressed mood (yeah, some of us are still in that!), out of that unfriendly friendship, out of whatever is holding you back from being happy! Amen!

Back to today being boring! So there might be ways to change that, let's see... I got invited to be at Hush tonight; I haven't clubbed in years! I'm not sure I will tonight either. I've got over a hundred movies on Agnes; I've got to study, yea I've got to study! How did I forget that?! Congrats to all of us that's been waiting on ASUU and the FG to end their shit, many of us are moving our asses back to school starting next week; I got 2 papers left before I hit the big G! But studying does not help boredom, does it? Nah... that one is ruled out!

Meanwhile, some mysterious person's been texting me since last night... what am I going to do with all these stalkers sef?! Tseeew.

Without a clue still as how to kill this boredom, I say TGIF! - Thank God it's February; thank God it's Friday... it's a double-blessing day, people! You've still got a few hours more to maximise and squeeze the fun out of it! Enjoy...