Singles’ meetings are always kinda interesting in my church, especially the socialising and bonding that takes place after the meetings end. Every Sunday evening that one is going to hold, I try my darndest to attend.
So, another singles’ meeting… talk… talk… interactive talk, more talk… and then it came to an end. Usually I stay on to bond and mingle and hug and stuff… “but not today” I said to myself, “I gotta run before someone tries to drag me to another meeting.” (There was another meeting to be held later that evening, but I just wasn’t in the mood for anymore).
It is of general knowledge that when you’re trying to avoid or run away from something or someone, you have to take tiny, little, noiseless steps (or is it noiseless, tiny, little steps..? waheva jor) so the person does not hear you leave; so wrong! Sometimes you need to run – run so somebody does not engage you in something; run so you don’t have to be tied up in something; run so they can hear and see you and understand that you don’t wanna be involved in whatever it is that’s going on; *screaming* run, little red riding hood, run for your life! *breathless*… ok, ignore that last part.
Anyways so I ran! and fortunately I caught up with Josef, he was going home too (I don’t know if he ran too or sneaked, lol). Then we decided to walk home instead of taking the bus, and we got our gist on.
-pause- Who is Josef?
Obviously, he’s my church member, duh! He’s also my neighbour, my new friend (feels like I’ve known him for ages tho); I plan to make him my lawyer too (I haven’t told him about that plan tho; but I’m sure he’ll accept! I’m irresistible! :D). So, that’s Josef!
I really can’t remember what it was but we started laughing about something and all of a sudden that laugh hung on my face for some reason… you know when your PC is working and co-operating with you, and then all of a sudden it just hangs, even the cursor won’t move? Yeah, it was something like that. I went from laughing out loud to expressionless to looking back and to a frown and almost cussing! Josef asked what was wrong with me and I blurted out “that guy just tried to grab my ass!” We looked back and the scumbag had gotten on a bike and gone off! I was so mad, so was Josef! And then he said something that inspired this blog… “why would he do something like that? I mean, it’s basic instinct to wanna do something nasty like that when you see a fine ass girl like you (okay he didn’t say that, I’m just lying, lol) but the ability to control yourself and let your sanity take over is what matters…” He didn’t quite say it like that sha, can’t remember the original words he used but I’m sure y’all understand what I’m trying to say.
So, in my head I responded to that question/statement that Josef made… and here is what I thought in my head:
There are guys and there are … guys! I wish I could draw a table right now to show the differences between my friend Josef and this ass grabber guy; but here goes anyways…
Josef is sane… Ass grabber is insane (disagree with me all you want, but trying to grab some chick’s ass on the road, in public, where a lotta people are is just all round wrong and insane!). Point One!
Josef is human… Ass grabber is an animal (Yeah! True! He let his animal instincts take over and without thinking he raised his hand and tried to grab my tail feather!)
Josef wouldn’t want someone to do something like that to his sister or future wife… Ass grabber, if he has a sister, doesn’t care! Matter of fact, he’d grab his sister’s ass anytime (which I think this particular guy might be doing already, I just hope for his sister’s sake that he hasn’t started testing that ass!). And somehow, if he manages to get a wife? I really pity her cos we all know fer sure that he ain’t gonna be paying her bottom cheeks no attention, nah! he’ll divert all the wife’s-ass-deserved attention to his sister-in-law or the maid. #truestory!
Ok, that’s all the conversation I had in my small little head. Oh, and then I also thought I should make up my mind about taking my BFF’s advice on carrying a knife about! Slice anything sliceable, including rude hands! All ye ass grabbers and feelers out there, better beware lest you feel the wrath of a very sharp knife! This dudette ain’t gonna let someone else try to grab her derriere in the future and get away with it, na ahn!
*** I apologise to all of ye that has asked me to stop saying words like “ass, fuck”, etc cos they’re vulgar, there was just no better word to use; but seriously it’s not that vulgar, it’s just ass… ass… ass… ass… ass… ass… ass… ass… ass… ass… ass… ass… LMAO! Oops, sorry! *wink*
HMMMMMMMM
ReplyDelete