BEND-DOWN-SELECT UNDIES

My friend heard me screaming “That shit ain’t right!” He thought I was on one of my endless-chatter/scream sprees again… Took a while before he could get the reason for the screaming outta me.
Guys, have you ever dated a chick who has a penchant for second-hand, fairly-used, or in a more popular language, bend-down select clothes? Yeah? No? Well, I don’t have a problem with those chicks (cos na condition make crayfish bend)… the chicks I actually have a problem with are those that have a strong liking for bend-down-select underwear.

What is Bend-down-select Underwear?

This can be defined as the undergarment worn next to the skin and under the outer garments, however purchased probably in an open market, at a not-so-different-from-new-never-been-worn-by-any-other-person-underwear price; in which the buyer gives the excuse of its supposed durability and a longer lasting tendency as excuse for buying it. Oh, did I mention they smell like they’ve been mothballed since forever? Yeah, they do.

My Beef!

If I was a dude and I found out that 90% of my girlfriend’s undergarments are of the bend-down-select sort, I would so break up with her! Ok, I’m just kidding… I’d probably talk with her and ask her to discontinue use and pray she listens, or she’ll be listening to me complaining on and on for as long as I can till I can’t take it no more.

What? I haven’t stated what my beef is? Ok, my beef is that if I was making love to my girl in some bend-down-select underwear, I would feel like I was with 2 different women – the real owner of the bra, and my girlfriend. And as much as I know you guys dream/desire/love threesomes or 'moresomes', I’m sure you’d like to act it out for real, not make love to the other girl’s underwear; you know, real not imagined.

And then as a girl, it'd be like I've got some girl’s undies stashed in my wardrobe; and when I do put on the bra, I’d feel like I have a stranger-girl’s hands all over my boobs! Ugh! *thinks about it* Double ugh!!! And it’s not like they’re even cheaper or anything like that! I asked.

My friend can’t stop laughing… I’m beginning to laugh myself. Mehn… that shit crazy!
… and then he had to throw this bomb into the already messy situation… guess what he just asked? Are there fairly-used panties too? Do ladies buy those too? *screams* I don’t know, and I don’t even think I’m interested in knowing!!! THAT SHIT AIN’T RIGHT!!!!