I Hate My Girl Brain

I stole this from:
Friday Faves: I Hate My Girl Brain : College Candy

I just had to! I likey... for those that can't click and get redirected, here's the full story:


I woke up this morning in a mood. I had a fight with my Ish last night. (You know, the guy in your life who isn’t quite your boyfriend, but is more than the guy you’re dating; he’s boyfriend-ish). It wasn’t even really a fight. It was me being frustrated at him for various reasons, expressing that frustration, and him responding in an even more frustrating, nonchalant way. So I went to bed mad, and, not surprisingly, I woke up mad.

But I don’t blame my Ish. At least that small part of me that is actually rational doesn’t. I blame my anger on my girl brain, the (overwhelmingly large) part of my brain that I hate. I know that everybody knows what I’m talking about because, face it, you have a girl brain, too. And you probably hate it for the same reasons I do.

1. My stupid girl brain makes me overanalyze everything.

What I say: “Ish, I am mad because you aren’t affectionate and that makes me think you don’t like me.”

What Ish says: “I do like you. I’m just not an exceptionally affectionate person like you are.”

What my ears hear: “I do like you. I’m just not an exceptionally affectionate person like you are.”

What my girl brain hears: “You’re right. I don’t like you. Actually, the thought of hugging or kissing you makes me want to throw up and run away.”

This happens in all sorts of situations, not just with Ish. It happens with friends, roommates, and professors. I overanalyze everyday sentences and make them into things they are not. Usually into something passive aggressive meant to slight me in some horrible way. My logical brain knows this is not the truth, but my girl brain makes it so.

2. My stupid girl brain makes ridiculous demands.

What my girl brain says: “I WANT CHOCOLATE!!!”

What I say: “Girl brain, it’s 7:30am. No chocolate.”

What my girl brain says: “YOU WILL GET ME CHOCOLATE NOW OR I WILL RELEASE A FLOOD OF HORMONES SO HORRIFIC YOU WILL UNCONTROLLABLY SOB FROM NOW UNTIL NEXT WEEK!”

What I say: “You win, girl brain. You win.”

3. My stupid girl brain makes me sob uncontrollably.

What I say: “Today is a good day for laundry. I should also reorganize my dresser drawers.”
[I then proceed to remove and re-fold everything in my dresser, when girl brain interrupts my progress.]

What my girl brain says: “Why can’t you fold this sweater??? Your lack of legitimate motor skills is really, really sad. Not sad in the pathetic way, but sad in the tears and other fluids spewing from your face kinda way.”

Yes, every few weeks I cry uncontrollably about nothing. Last week I really did cry all day because I couldn’t fold a sweater properly. Then I got an eyelash in my eye. That really pushed me over the edge.

4. My stupid girl brain is mean and critical.

What I say: “These jeans fit perfectly. And they’d look so cute with my new riding boots!”

What my girl brain says: “What is with that little strip of fat poking out of the top? And look at your thighs! Maybe these would look better on you if you stopped eating chocolate at 7:30 in the morning.”

5. My stupid girl brain is masochistic.

What I say: “No, you’re not going to look at the ex’s new girlfriend’s photos on Facebook. You’ve got better things to do with your time. Plus, you’ve got someone new so you don’t care.”

What my girl brain says: “YOU WILL LOOK AT THOSE PHOTOS RIGHT NOW. THEN YOU WILL LOOK AT ALL OF HER FRIENDS’ PHOTOS. Then you will ask your friends to look at them and tell you that you are prettier. And happier. And so much better off without him.”

What I say (while eating a bag of Fritos in bed): I HATE YOU, GIRL BRAIN.

—

I love being a girl (especially because I can use makeup to cover up the puffy, post-sob fest dark circles under my eyes), but sometimes this girl brain thing is just too much. I’m irrational, I’m angry, I’m emotional…and hard as I try, there’s nothing I can do to change it. Much like boobs and the ability to have children, it sorta comes with the territory. And that just makes my girl brain rage even more.

Sigh. Grrr. Sob.

Underneath Your Clothe...

Days ago, I put up the chorus of ‘Underneath your Clothe’ as my FB status update and I don’t know what some people were thinking o! Bad, dirty-minded human beings, they want to make me bad come hell or high water! No be by force o, ah!

So I decided to show y’all what I had in mind when I was singing that song out loud:

…yes! I was thinking that and just that! It was just this well-toned, well-built, I-wanna-drink-it-up, sexy stomach that I was picturing in my head, just it! (who am I trying to convince, sef? *smh*)
Anyways, the song says it’s what I deserve for being such a good girl... so I’m thinking if this includes one of the things I get for being such a good girl, mehn! I wanna be a good girl for life!

FYI, I didn’t google that image… but I’m not gonna tell whose it is, so don’t ask! And here’s the song for those who care to listen and picture something nice in their head (just don’t picture my own image o, na there fight go start o, eh ehn!)

	Shakira - Underneath Your Clothes .mp3
	Found at bee mp3 search engine

Awesome God!!!

It's a great Sunday o... and what other way to start than go Metal! Gospel Metal sha... (I'm being a good girl on a Sunday morning).

I particularly love this one, starts mild and then... head-bangingish; cos my God is an awesome God! Oh yes Lord!!!



Oh btw, it's Awesome God by Pergamum!

Jaginma!

Since I can't sleep, I'm starting my Sunday early.... yessss Lord!!!

For all His goodness and favour; steadfast love, unceasing care and unending mercy, I just have to praise Him (even if it means annoying the neighbours, hehehe). And this is the song that's on repeat:



B s/out to my boy Effizee, you done did good with this one!

PARTY FOOD!!!

Another Saturday; I see smiles on people's faces this cool cold evening! I guess the weddings they all attended went great or at least the food was plenty and palatable... emphasis on PLENTY!

I remember my Mushin days where you find that most people at the party weren't invited, you know, the popular 'mo gbo, mo branch' kinda people. But seriously, who wouldn't 'gbo' and branch when there are foods like this:

... and like this:

ESPECIALLY this:

AND this:

We certainly cannot blame the 'mo gbo, mo branch' people, jor... these party foods are hard to resist!!!

Enjoy the rest of your weekend, and make sure to consume Andrews Liver Salts when the rewards of your gluttony starts to manifest... hahaha!!!

TOP 8 reasons why I love F!

Almost everyday we come across articles on Top 10 this, Top 5 that... Today, I've seen very weird and almost BS Top somethings; imagine Top Ten reasons why you should love your cat (oh puh-lease! I don't need a top ten whatever to love my cat, I love my cat already, I mean that's why I have it!); Top 5 ways on how to fail an interview (umm.. excuse me? why would I wanna know that? I think I'd rather be interested in Top 5 ways on how NOT to fail an interview, dumbass!); Top 30 unapproved names for a woman's bush (ehn! after I know nko? what will I do with them? they are 'unapproved' remember?)

So I want to do copy copy; here's my BS Top 8 for the week:

TOP 8 Reasons why I love the letter F (hehehe!)

1. Obviously cos it's the first letter in my name, duh!

2. Cos it's the first letter in 'Facebook' (I'm sure that don't need no further explanation).

3. Cos I'm in love with all the letters of the alphabet, anyways (just 'cause).

4. Cos it's the first word in 'fight' (I love Wrestling, thanks to sticking to PJOM's side when I was growing up).

5. The good things in life start with the letter F; fish and chips, friends, free meals, free midnight calls, final year (to grad), flings, and so on...

Did I say 8? I meant to write 5!

Lullaby...

Talk of bedtime stories, I don't think no one ever read one to me... but talk of bedtime songs..? now, that's what I'm talking about.

I got a coupla songs that I like to fall asleep to, depending on the mood. And now it's 11:21pm; I'm ready to fall asleep cos... someone left me stranded in between a conversation...

So tonight it's me falling asleep with Ace of Base. I don't have a mood for this one... it's the perfect lullaby... *yawns*

	Ace Of Base - Everytime It Rains .mp3
	Found at bee mp3 search engine